Romans 12:9-17

• 9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.
• 10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honour one another above yourselves.
• 11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervour, serving the Lord.
• 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
• 13 Share with God's people who are in need. Practise hospitality.
• 14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
• 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.
• 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
• 17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody.

INTRODUCTION: Today we return to our series in the Book of Romans. This passage in Romans chapter twelve has to do with the theme of "brotherly love." It is not about the love of God. It is not about how to love the other children of your mother and father. It is not about how to love God's enemies. These are important subjects, but the theme of our passage today is BROTHERLY love. It is about how to love your brothers and sisters IN THE LORD. Your fellow church members. That's what it is about. So, what does Paul say to us about that? There are four points of emphasis in these verses.

I. Brotherly love must be sincere (Romans 12:9).

The Greek word is anupokritos, a combination of two Greek words. The first part means "without" and the second part means "hypocrisy." So "without hypocrisy" is the literal translation. Those of you who read the New American Standard Bible can see that they translated the word literally in that version. The King James translation reads, "Let love be without dissimulation." To dissimulate means "to fake it." Brotherly love is supposed to be REAL. It is supposed to be SINCERE, from the heart. It is not to be PRETENDED.

If we are honest with ourselves, we all are sometimes guilty of insincerity. There are common situations. For example, consider a husband and wife getting ready to go to church on Sunday morning. The wife tries on a dress, and says to her husband, "Honey, how do I look in this dress?" Now, in this situation, the husband knows that he is pretty well doomed, no matter what he says. So he always says back to her, "Honey, you look just great." He may not be sincere, but he has learned over the years to be careful about what he says! We say things to each other in church that we don't really mean. "I'll pray for you," for example. Then we go home and we DON'T pray. We were insincere.

In the church, we need to learn to love one another SINCERELY. We need to have REAL love. PRETEND love isn't really going to help very much. Pretend love won't really change the way we feel or act toward a brother in Christ, at least not for very long. And brotherly love needs to be more than what we do on Sunday morning at 11 AM. It is easy to pretend to love a brother for one hour. But it is challenging to truly love a brother or sister month after month, and year after year. Only REAL love can abide the test of time.

James the Apostle highlights the importances of REAL brotherly love....

• 14 ¶ What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him?
• 15 Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food.
• 16 If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it?
• (James 2:14-16)

II. Brotherly love involves feelings of affection that bind us together (Romans 12:10).

The King James version reads "be kindly affectioned one to another." The Greek word is philostorgoi. This is another of those two part Greek words. The first part means "love like a brother." The second part means "with affection." The NASB and NIV both translate it as "be devoted" to one another. The word is primarily about FEELINGS, or AFFECTIONS, but it means the sort of feelings that bind us together in loyal devotion.

If you have an actual brother or sister in your family at home, you will understand what this means. You have FEELINGS about your brother or sister. I hope your feelings are good! I hope you have affection. This is usually the case. Even in situations where your sibling has offended you, or has bothered you, or has let you down: still, somewhere deep inside, you probably still have some feelings of affection and good will toward your sibling. It is an old story: If you see two brothers fighting with each other, stay out of it. Don't take sides. Because they BOTH may turn on you.

As brothers and sisters in the Lord, and fellow church members, Paul is urging us to have these FEELINGS toward our fellow church members. We are the family of God. God is our Father. Jesus is our Big Brother. We are siblings. Paul wants us to have feelings of affection and loyalty to each other, just as we would with our natural born brothers and sisters. These are feelings FROM THE HEART!

In the old King James version we used to read about "bowels of love." (Today we say "I love you with all my HEART.)

For God is my record, how greatly I long after you all in the bowels of Jesus Christ.
(Philippians 1:8)

If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies...
Philippians 2:1

Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
Colossians 3:12

But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?
(I John 3:17)

III. Brotherly love leads us to honor one another (Romans 12:10, 13, 16).

Again, from James chapter two...

• 1 ¶ My brothers, as believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ, don’t show favouritism.
• 2 Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in shabby clothes also comes in.
• 3 If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, "Here’s a good seat for you," but say to the poor man, "You stand there" or "Sit on the floor by my feet,"
• 4 have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?
• 5 Listen, my dear brothers: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised those who love him?

• We hold the door for each other.
• We want the other person to have a good seat in worship.
• We don't care what someone is wearing.
• We let others get in front of us in the Homecoming lunch line.
• We let others choose the place or time of the Bible Study Fellowship group.
• We allow others to choose how to decorate a kitchen or bathroom.
• We willingly associate with others of different social standing and wealth.
• We give/share of our wealth/time to help one another.

These things require that we be humble. We must not be conceited. We must elevate ourselves above others in the church, even though we may be superior in Bible knowledge, or wealth, or community connections, or whatever. We DO have our differences. But in the church we lay aside those differences, and we associate with each other, and we try to help each other; and we are willing to receive help and advice from others.

IV. Brotherly love means that we bless those who persecute us, and refrain from repaying evil for evil (Romans 12:14, 17).

It is sad to say, but even in the church you will find people who will persecute you; and you will find people who will do you an evil turn.

• 7 All my enemies whisper together against me; they imagine the worst for me, saying,
• 8 "A vile disease has beset him; he will never get up from the place where he lies."
• 9 Even my close friend, whom I trusted, he who shared my bread, has lifted up his heel against me.
  (Psalm 41:7-9)

Some denominations teach that when you become a Christian, you never sin again. This is of course WRONG! Christians are sinners who have found salvation. As Christians we turn from our sin. But we are not perfect in this life. In this life we will have a continual struggle against temptation, and sometimes we will lose. And sometimes, even in the church, you will find people who will hate you, and persecute you, and do you an evil turn.

And in all humility, it is good for us if we admit that sometimes WE will be the one doing the hating, and persecuting. We must not be satisfied with this sort of status quo. We must, with the help of the Holy Spirit, repent, and get better. We need to grow in grace! We need to ask forgiveness. But be aware, that sometimes you will be persecuted, even by a brother or sister.

• 13 ¶ You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.
• 14 The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbour as yourself."
• 15 If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.
  (Galatians 5:13-15)

This can really hurt! We expect persecution outside the church, in the world. But when it happens IN the church, when a brother or sister stabs us in the back, we feel betrayed and heartbroken. Let's be doubly sure that none of us is the brother who has given in to sin, and is doing his brother/sister wrong!

When you find yourself being persecuted in the church, there are things you should do.

• 1. Just forgive and forget, if you can. Love covers a multitude of sin. Sometimes, we can just ignore, and love the person anyway.
• 2. If it is IMPORTANT -- Go to your brother, and explain the situation, and ask for a change.
• 3. If that won't work, take it to the elders. Something is happening that will harm the whole body of Christ, unless it is addressed.

• 15 ¶ "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over.
• 16 But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’
• 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.
• 18 "I tell you the truth, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.
• (Matt 18:15-18)

What NOT to do? 1) Don't let it fester in your heart for a long time, or you will become bitter. Forgive. 2) Don't retaliate evil for evil. 3) Don't gossip about it to other people in the church, or you will spread the misery to everyone. 4) DO repay good for evil. Do what is RIGHT in the eyes of all.

CONCLUSION: What does Paul teach us in these verses about brotherly love?

• 1. It should be sincere.
• 2. It should involve feelings of affection that bind us together.
• 3. It should lead us to honor each other.
• 4. It should make us forgiving and able to bless, even in the face of persecution.