Introduction: Jesus told the parable of the wise man and the foolish man. The foolish man built his house on the sand, and when the rains came, it was destroyed. The wise man built his house on a rock, and when the rains came, the house stood firm. In order for a marriage to be strong, it must be built on strong foundations. We are in the realm of "pre-marital counseling" here. The way you believe and act, the decisions you make, BEFORE you get married, will have a lasting impact on the success of your future marriage. Last week we saw that the Bible says that 1) we should save sex for marriage; and 2) we should listen to our parents and honor their wishes. Today we shall see what the Bible says about choosing friends, companions and eventual mates.

I. The Bible says that Christians should be choosy about the company they keep.

A. Read Psalm 1:1; Proverbs 24:1 and I Corinthians 5:11.

B. Where will you eventually find a wife or a husband? Throw darts at a phonebook? Send you name into a dating service? Marry a complete stranger? Of course not. Your future mate will come from your circle of companions.

C. What kind of a crowd do you hang out with? Believers or non-believers? People who think Faith is important, or people who think Faith is boring? People who lie and gossip, or people who tell the truth and speak well of others? People with the values of the world, or people who have decided to follow Christ? People who value people for their popularity and good-looks, or people who value others for their character?

D. Choose your crowd carefully: 1) because their values will rub off on you, and 2) because your future mate is likely to be one of the crowd.

II. It is vital that YOU be a true Christian, and that you choose a mate who is a true Christian.

A. The Bible says so: 2 Corinthians 6:14 and see I Corinthians 7:39 on remarriage. This is the will of God. Will you obey Him, or rebel and do your own thing?

B. Why must you marry only another believer?

1. For your own relationship. "Can two walk together except they be agreed?"
2. For your children. What will you teach them to do and be, if you and your mate disagree?
3. For your church and your Lord: How can you serve the Lord if your mate is holding you back?

III. Choose a prospective mate based on the quality of MATURITY.

A. Marriage is not for boys and girls, it is for MEN and WOMEN. It is not playing house. Marriage and family is the basic building block of society, instituted by God Himself at the beginning of the world.

B. Physical maturity. Don't get married too young. Give your body and brain time to reach their full potential, and then to be settled down. If you marry someone too young, you may find a different person there five years down the road.

C. Mental maturity. Marry someone who has finished his/her education. Getting married, raising a family, working a job, and going to school simultaneously has caused many a divorce. The stress is too great. NOTE: marry someone at your own intellectual level.

D. Spiritual maturity: Marry a woman who knows how to be a wife and a mother. Marry a man who knows how to be a husband and a father. Yes, marriage is for companionship. But, children and family is a big part of what marriage is all about (see Psalm 127:3-5 and Psalm 128:3-4).

E. Financial maturity. Two thoughts here from scripture:

1. Marry a man who is able to provide a home and a living (I Timothy 5:8).
2. Marry a mate who knows how to work and is not lazy (Prov. 31 and consider Jacob working 14 years for Leah and Rachel.)

Conclusion: If you want to have a strong marriage someday, it is important to lay a solid foundation before you seek a mate.

1. Save sex for marriage.
2. Listen to your parents.
3. Choose friends who are real Christians.
4. Make up your mind to marry only a Christian.
5. Become a mature person, and decide to marry only another mature Christian.